HOLY GRAIL

Lenny Bruce once said
that every man’s ideal
woman is a cross
between a whore and a
kindergarten teacher.

With that in mind, I prowl
the streets searching
for a female wearing a black
micro-mini, eight inch heels,
a see-through mesh
halter top and carrying
a copy of Grimm’s
fairytales.

I’ve had no luck
to date.

 

SWEET MUSIC

the only difference
between jazz
and jizz
is i

but i
can’t play
the sax.

i do,
however,

have
you.

 

Flowers of Evil

Those flowers of
evil Baudelaire wrote
about are sitting here
in my vase, a parting
gift from me to her.
She looked at them coldly
and told me, flowers
won’t work this time.
Then she left without
another word. They’ve
been in the vase
on the kitchen table
ever since, brown and
wilted, rotting in
stagnant water, growing
more evil by the day.

 

HOW I LOST MY FAITH

I was driving
home
from the job
one day
when I saw
workmen installing
a lightning rod
atop a
church.

I figured if
He’d do that
to them,

what hope is
there for me?

 

CLUELESS

I gave her $10
and told her to go
buy herself a
clue.

An hour later
she returned with
a copy of Cosmopolitan,
a Mars bar and a
can of Coke.

I suppose it’s
my fault for
being so damn
trusting.

 

symphony of the insane

i am an instrument
of her playing –

a string to pluck
a drum to beat
a horn to blow

sometimes we make
beautiful music

at other times it is
like a symphony
of the insane.

either way, one
encore is never
enough.

 

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